Flowing with FEBI
Credit: berkay08 (AI generated), Canva
Written by: Scott Lillich
“What do you notice about the difference between these two?”
My Zen teacher gestured toward two pieces of freshly brushed calligraphy.
We had been practicing shodo daily during a four-day sesshin, and these were two of our most recent attempts. I could tell the one on the right was mine. I suspected the one on the left was his. I appreciated that he didn’t say.
“Well,” I began, “there’s strong energy in both. The ink is bold. But the one on the right feels a bit clumsy. The one on the left feels more coherent.”
“What else?” he asked.
I kept looking. I knew there was more to see, but I kept coming back to a familiar place. Mine wasn’t as good. I wasn’t very good at this yet.
And then it clicked.
“There’s a lack of flow!” I blurted out. “Each character feels separate. They don’t connect.”
He nodded. “Yes. I see that in your Tai Chi as well. You move as if each posture is separate. I’d like you to focus on flowing from one posture to the next. Keep moving. Keep flowing.”
Keep moving. Keep flowing.
The phrase stayed with me like a koan in the days that followed.
Where was I moving like that in the rest of my life? In my work? My parenting? My health?
A few days later, after a client session using the FEBI model, something clicked again.
I realized I was relating to the FEBI patterns in the same way. Visionary. Collaborator. Driver. Organizer. Each one like its own posture. Something I would step into, use, and then leave behind as I moved to the next.
But what if they weren’t meant to be accessed one at a time?
What if they were meant to flow?
I had explored this before with my friend and fellow IZL instructor Kelly Bannister. We even introduced a simple movement practice we called the “FEBI Flow” during a pilot FEBI Practice Community this past winter along with Jasleen Kaur and Nic Etheridge Calder (stay tuned for more info on this soon). I realized, though, that I was still holding the patterns apart in my own body.
So, I stood up and began to experiment. I invite you to do the same with me now.
I moved into the swinging rhythm of Collaborator. Then, without pausing, I shifted into the more direct, cutting movements of Driver. Then back again to Collaborator. Back and forth, quicker and quicker, smoother and smoother.
At first it felt a bit mechanical. But as I kept moving, something began to change.
The transitions softened. The edges blurred.
At a certain point, the two patterns began to merge or collapse into one another. I found myself smiling, but not softly. It was a kind of fierce smile. In that moment, I felt an energy that was both deeply relational and intensely direct. Supportive and demanding at the same time. Like an athletic coach or personal trainer pushing someone to their edge in service of their growth.
It wasn’t Collaborator or Driver.
It was both, moving together.
I explored other combinations as well, and each revealed something different. But the deeper lesson was not in any one pairing.
It was in the flowing itself.
Since then, I’ve kept returning to this in a simple way. Moving between patterns without stopping. Letting them overlap. Letting them inform each other and even playing with new movements that feel to me like two patterns at the same. I’ve even begun to weave this into my daily Qigong practice, and each time I come back to it, something new shows up.
This is still very much an experiment for me, but what I’m beginning to notice is how quickly the sense of separation starts to dissolve.
The patterns stop feeling like tools to apply and start to feel like something already alive and available.
What I’m beginning to suspect is that the patterns may not be meant to be held apart. When they begin to move together, something more natural starts to emerge.
I’d be genuinely curious what you notice if you try this yourself, and I always appreciate hearing how others are working with FEBI in their own practice. If you feel moved to share, I’d love to hear what you discover.
In the meantime, Keep moving. Keep flowing.
Gassho,
Scott
Scott Lillich is an ICF certified Executive Coach and Management Trainer who specializes in helping leaders to more skillfully navigate Difficult Conversations, master Conflict, and build highly Collaborative and Cohesive Teams. He is also a certified NLP Coach, a Master Practitioner of NLP and a long-time student of NVC, Zen, Qigong and, more recently, the nonviolent martial art Aikido.